It’s been a while since I’ve written here consistently… thanks to My Space, Friendster and most recently, Facebook… but for just plain old fashion blogging, xanga is still the best for me. 

I can’t help but smirk, at the thought that I’m just now starting to really grow up… I realized that blooming late is a trend in my life, but this is really ridiculous, but maybe, just maybe, 2008 will find Jae Bum fulfilling more of his potential and living life with courage, no longer just a “nice guy” who gives in too often but a “tough guy” who shows kindness often.  One can only hope. 

I had a weird thought today… maybe it isn’t so weird for those who’ve thought it, but I just got really tired of being a “nice guy”.  You know what they say about “nice guys” and finishing last; I can see how that can be true but I don’t want to be that guy… a finishing last kind of guy.  But I can’t deny what I am and how I think, the way I make judgment calls and the logic I use to make decisions.  I can improve myself with more knowledge and seeking Wisdom, but will it really change the nature of my “niceness”, the kind that gets kinda pushed over? 

It gets tiring… biting your tongue… taking that extra deep breath to sooth a surging retaliation… to overlook a wrong… it’s draining. 

This isn’t a rant… it’s not a complaint…  it’s just how things are for me…

The flip side of looking out for myself is that I’m easily absorbed in it, losing sight of what I want to be in what I understand as being Godly.  I’m always on polar ends, either being “too nice” or “too selfish” and can’t seem to find a balance.  But there’s always hope and I’m not moping around.  2008… 8 is the Biblical number for new beginnings and 7 is the  Biblical number for the completion of a rough period.  Get my drift? 

Over the years, some friends have commented that I’m nothing like the first impression I gave them.  This makes me chuckle, too.  It’s almost a cliche, having grown up in Tacoma, to have the tough/rough exterior but the overly sensitive inside… it only makes sense that sensitive areas need more protection, right? 

Anyways… today, I was tired of being a “nice guy” but “tomorrow” will make me just a bit stronger… a bit closer to fulfilling my potential… living up to expectations, not of others, but of my own that God has placed in me. 

I have to protect my family and friends and above all, live for the faith I believe to be the single absolute truth – Jesus died for me and you… and you and you… ’cause He really really likes us a lot. 

It’s okay to be ambitious.

What am I really writing about???  Sometimes I wonder if I should be embarrassed about the things I write here, having whomever reading my thoughts… Not sure… just thinking in written form. 

2007 is a good year…
2008 will be better… and better… and better.
I know it.

God is good!

. . . unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven
—Matthew 18:3

These words the Lord spoke to His disciples almost always created an image of myself returning to a younger stage in life, to a time of sheltered living and ignorance, in which one could say is a more “pure” state.  I couldn’t have been more wrong. 

God wants for us to have greater knowledge and wisdom; “ignorance is bliss” is NOT a compelling argument.  We often refer to someone who doesn’t know the ways of the world to be “so pure” and “untainted”, and to some extent it’s true, but true purity, I believe, comes from choosing to be so… and it’s not about being “untainted” as much as it is about “good housekeeping”. 

It’s a struggle to be pure; we’re surrounded by contaminants and with the advance of technology, there are so many more tools that can used for evil.  Just like money, internet for example is not evil in itself, but the manner in which we deploy its usefulness…and motive. 

My thoughts today dwell on this… that I am a work in progress.  Key word is “work”. 

It takes work…

So, this past week, i came across a great deal on ebay.  Turns out it was fraudulent.

This guy wanted me to wire money to some “broker agent” in Florida who works for Square Trade [a legitimate company] but the thing is, Square Trade doesn’t broker transactions; they only deal with warranties.

So, this guy, “Bobby” and I have been exchanging e-mails; with each e-mail, he became progressively more aggressive, threatening to leave negative feedback if I didn’t send him that check for $3100… went on saying how he already paid for shipping, etc., and asked me if I was going to be one of those bad customers on ebay that would cost him $100 in shipping.  He wanted to send it UPS World Express, which is for international shipping, and there’s no way it would only cost $100.

He even had an e-mail doctored to look like it was confirmation from ebay.  Amazing… because the e-mail address was legit but the content was not.

The last e-mail I wrote him, I was like, “Are you serious?!?!”  He threatened me and said he would seek arbitration.  Can you believe that?!?!
I even did a search for his mailing address and it doesn’t exist.  What nerve…

I’m not upset because the deal was fraudulent so much as for the guy having the audacity to threaten me.
I can only laugh… not so much.

I told him I had confirmation from ebay and Square Trade that this deal is bogus…

He claims his name is bobby riggins and he “lives” in New Jersey but the agent “Michael Griffin” is in Florida.  I suspect that “bobby” lives there, too.
his e-mail addres is bob004806@aol.com
his ebay user id is bob004806

I only post this as a warning to others.

Anyways, all you online Christmas shoppers, beware.  If it’s too good to be true, it really isn’t.

God is good!
Thieves are not.